Author Archives: A Boy Less Ordinary

One of the things that I find most challenging about life with JJ is the strange juxtaposition of his reliance on routine and need for spontaneity. Sometimes both at the same time! Routine here at JJ towers takes the form of:  Eating meals at the same time each day: 8.30am, noon and 5pm.Eating the same,Continue reading “Routine and spontaneity”

JJ got bullied at our local park last week. We’ve been trying to encourage his newfound desire for independence, and so let him go ahead to the park on his own for a few mins. By the time we got there, three boys were talking to him, and from JJ’s body language, and from theContinue reading “Vulnerable”

I just wanted to share a real success story *for JJ* yesterday. Birthdays have always been tremendously hard in our home. Whether it was JJ’s, or someone else’s, the anxiety around the day for him has almost always outweighed any enjoyment that could have been gained. A few years ago we decided to officially stopContinue reading “It’s a birthday thing”

Have you seen the recent video shared by Send Reform England? It was a frankly horrific clip of Warwickshire County Council’s ‘Children & Young Person’s Scrutiny’ meeting (from an original post on TikTok made by Elissa Noves). The video shows three councillors making incredibly derogatory remarks about children with SEND and their families. I won’tContinue reading “The flowers and the weeds”

Has your child or young person ever acted in a way that made you think: ‘they don’t seem to have any empathy?!’ Perhaps you’ve been trying to get them to see your point of view about something, and it just seems impossible. Maybe they’ve exhibited some distressed behaviour in the form of a meltdown, andContinue reading “Empathy does exist”

I wrote this blog about my dislike of the word ‘naughty’ in 2021. It popped into my mind in recent weeks when a certain high-profile self-proclaimed ‘supernanny’ decided to share her thoughts on naughtiness, and how we now prefer to ‘label’ our kids, rather than admit they are just naughty. Ok, I’m just going toContinue reading “‘Naughtiness’ doesn’t exist”

Separation anxiety is a really bloody complicated thing. And when you have a neurodivergent child, it can be totally overwhelming and affect so many aspects of family life. As parents, it can make us feel smothered, frustrated and angry even. Desperate for time away from our children to be able to rest, re-calibrate and beContinue reading “Separation Anxiety”

This is the article about distressed behaviour and the devastating effect it has on neurodivergent young people and their families that I needed to read all those years ago. It was published in the October/November 2022 issue of SEN Magazine and you can read their online version here. The meltdown is a highly emotive subjectContinue reading “My article for SEN magazine: We need to talk about meltdowns”

I’m getting to the point where, sometimes, I get asked for my advice by parents of PDAers. I still find this strange and think to myself ‘why are they asking me?!’ If you could have seen me and my family at the start of lockdown, you may not recognise us as the same people. It’sContinue reading “One Piece of Advice?”

Dear families and friends of parents with PDAers, Firstly, let me just tell you this. From the bottom of my heart. We GET it. It’s really hard to understand our lives. We see the disbelief in your eyes, the way you wince when you witness situations that seem entirely out of our parental control. YouContinue reading “Dear families and friends…”